How to Quit a Job

Step 1: Be indispensable but also hate your job.

Step 2: Get hired for another job that you will like more.

Step 3: Tell your current employer that you found a job that will pay more and be a better long-term career move.

Step 4: Said boss will be really sad and not want you to leave. This is where being indispensable comes in.

Step 5: Current boss will offer you a raise to stay for two more months. (win)

Step 6: New employer says, "That is no problem at all you can start whenever you like."

Step 7: Current employer says, "Any day you are not subbing you can work here as a floater."


This is how you quit a job and come out winning. I was a little apprehensive that I may not enjoy subbing as much as preschool, but then yesterday I got poop under my fingernails while checking a diaper and then a girl was licking a long string of snot coming out of her nose and I threw up on the playground. So, subbing will involve less bodily fluids... I am crossing my fingers that when I have my own baby, these things will not horrify me as much.